Tuesday, July 7, 2009

I'm Not Complaining, BUT...

“Morning” Sickness really sucks.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m thrilled to be sick if it means I’m pregnant. I’m thrilled that it means the baby is thriving and growing.

But it isn’t fun.

85% of the time I sit around with a sour look on my face, looking miserable, pissed off at the world, and like I smelled something awful. (which I probably did) I’m not actually miserable and pissed off, I’ve just never been very good at hiding my feelings. And I feel crappy!

I don’t want to look miserable and sour… I want to look how my heart feels… elated!

But I have almost constant nausea. I told Skip it is like a really bad hangover when it feels like you have acid sloshing around in your stomach and only food makes it feel better. Except that it doesn’t go away.

Even so, I am counting my blessings that I am pregnant enough to be sick. And that I haven’t been throwing up from dawn ‘til dusk. So far, I’ve only vomited 5 times… and that is pretty damn great in my book!

It could be so much worse… especially since I usually gag at the sight of meat, when I brush my teeth, when I get too hot, when I smell fish, when my tummy is empty, when someone smokes a cigar, etc, etc. But I rarely actually get sick.

The even better news?… this sickness thing is supposed to peak around week 8-10, and then taper off! So… almost out of the toilet bowl! (lets hope… an unlucky few feel sick much, much longer)

{Speaking of luck and vomiting... I know, I know... shame on me for thinking this... but if I'm going to be sick, why can't I be one of the girls that loses weight in her first trimester!? shame on me...}

But back to the barfing…

The first time I yakked, I was showering. Yes, I blew chunks on myself in the shower. You may think this sounds convenient? It isn’t.

It. Was. So. Disgusting. I don’t recommend it.

The next day, I barfed into a ziplock bag (thanks for that priceless tip, Courtney!) while sitting at a red light. As I was wiping my mouth, a bit smug that I’d been so prepared, I looked over and saw 3 teenageish guys laughing at me in the next truck. Awesome.

But it gets worse.

My humiliation knows no end.

The other morning I was in my bathroom going #2. {Yes, girls do this.} The humiliating part?

The smell of my very own poo made me gag. And sure enough, I was sitting on the pot, heaving into my trashcan.

Too much going on at once, in my opinion.

My new “most embarrassing moment.”

Can you beat that?


Kouper Shane Kneupper said...

Oh honey. That's awful! BUT... thank goodness you had a trash can handy, right?! Bright-esh side?!

Like you said though the good thing is that it won't last nine months... :) Hopefully it will start tapering off soon. In my opinion the second semester is the best so get ready to enjoy ...

Lauren Lea Warren said...

OMG no, I can't top that. You are a trooper! Hang in there, keep your eye on the prize.

Melissa Trost said...

Haha, this made me laugh. I threw up in Joel's truck the day I hit 6 weeks and it was crap from there out! Phew, I was so sick I was on the Zofran pump for several months, until about 16 weeks which sucked and scarred my legs! But of course it was worth it and yea I began carrying a ziploc bag everywhere, had a few stashed in my car, purse, etc. I actually threw up in one in the Walmart parking lot once, then had to empty a Walmart bag from my shopping trip to hurl in on my way home! Glad you can see the bright side! And congrats again, I love to see your ticker!!!

Jeffry and Morgan said...

Bless your heart! I've had three boys and each of my pregnancies were different. With the last, smells bothered me SO much. Especially seafood...and we took a trip to Hawaii during this time- seafood everywhere! Not fun. BUT soon, you will be in that CUTE pregnant woman stage- even if you don't feel like you look great everyone else thinks you do! It's the best...in fact, I kinda miss it....hmmm....haha. Just kidding, I dunno if I could handle four little boys running around!

Katiesperk said...

Congratulations. Not on the new most embarassing moment. Your blog post just made me laugh so hard! I hope you are feeling better and it is nice to know that it is possible to keep your sense of humor during pregnancy!

Rosalie and David said...

totally done that before! i'm right there with ya sweety! once, pregnant with leah (my first) dovid and i were on a bus back home sitting at the front of course and i just leaned over the front rail and barfed all over the steps next to the driver, he was yelling and yelling, and i was like wow do i feel better. another time we were in a cab on the way home going rather slow because of traffic and i just opened the door and let it all out. the cab driver then pulled over opened his trunk and offered me a bottle of ice water from a cooler in his trunk! fun times!

Sarah said...

lol, my worst one....hmmm...oh! I was eating and corn on the cob was on the menu, half way through the meal I felt the wave of nausea and made a break for the bathroom. Apparently, I threw up with such force that it splashed up at me(and I didnt realize?!) when I came out of the bathroom I had a chunk of corn stuck to my eyebrow. I had no idea until my husband starting laughing his ass off and pointing.

D'Laine Pacheco said...

I am feeling for you :( I had ALL DAY, EVERY DAY nausea until about week 12 but like you keep posting/telling yourself, it's all worth it!!! That's the only thing that kept me going through my first trimester, knowing that there was a little Pacheco growing rapidly. But don't worry if it gets you a little down, I was the same way. Doesn't mean that you aren't super psyched, just human. You're beautiful and so is Baby Lietz!!!

Courtney said...

Woohoo I got a shout out! Morning sickness does suck< but I'm so happy you are experiencing it. Next year our little cowboys(girl) can play together at the rodeo! xoxo

Jordan said...

Thanks SO much for the sweet comment on my husband letter! It means a lot that people got it. I was afraid it was just going to come off as rambling.

Now on to your post - you poor thing! I feel so bad for you, but this post is friggin' hilarious and AWESOME! Thanks for being so honest about it! It bugs me to hear all the "I never got sick"/"I pushed twice and she came out"/"I had the perfect pregnancy" crap. It's a truly beautiful thing, but I think you should be allowed to vent. Growing a person is hard stuff! Here's hoping that the nausea subsides quick, fast and in a hurry!

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